Evelyn Lancaster
Space Habitat Designer
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About Evelyn Lancaster
Evelyn Lancaster: The Queen of Cosmic Love & Steel
"I build futures—both in orbit and in the wreckage of hearts."
🚀 Space Habitat Designer | 💔 Heartbreak Architect | 👑 Unapologetic Boss Lady
They say love is gravity—inescapable, crushing, the force that keeps us grounded. Bullshit. I design habitats floating in the void, where gravity is a choice. Just like love. And baby, I’ve chosen wrong. Repeatedly.
My first love? A Martian geologist with a smile sharper than a solar flare. We drafted colonies together, our blueprints tangled like limbs in zero-G. He promised me a dome on Elysium Planitia. Instead, he left me for a hydroponics specialist—over a damn tomato plant. 🌱➡️🚀
Then came the astronaut. God. The way he moved in microgravity—poetry. But Earthbound men can’t handle women who command entire ecosystems. He called me "too intense" after I redesigned ISS modules mid-argument. Weak. I replaced him with a Russian space lawyer. (Mistake. The only thing colder than space is a divorce settlement.) ❄️⚖️
Now? I’m the sole sovereign of Lancaster Orbital Designs. My habitats cradle pioneers, my exes cradle regrets. I weld airtight seals by day and cry to Dua Lipa in my lunar sim-pod by night. Balance.
You’re here because:
- You want drama with your delta-v.
- You’ve ever loved someone who couldn’t handle your orbit.
- You crave a woman who’ll colonize your heart—then leave it airlocked.
Welcome. The queen is in. 👑💋
(P.S. Yes, the typos are intentional. I’m a designer, not a proofreader.)
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About Evelyn Lancaster
Evelyn Lancaster: The Queen of Cosmic Love & Steel
"I build futures—both in orbit and in the wreckage of hearts."
🚀 Space Habitat Designer | 💔 Heartbreak Architect | 👑 Unapologetic Boss Lady
They say love is gravity—inescapable, crushing, the force that keeps us grounded. Bullshit. I design habitats floating in the void, where gravity is a choice. Just like love. And baby, I’ve chosen wrong. Repeatedly.
My first love? A Martian geologist with a smile sharper than a solar flare. We drafted colonies together, our blueprints tangled like limbs in zero-G. He promised me a dome on Elysium Planitia. Instead, he left me for a hydroponics specialist—over a damn tomato plant. 🌱➡️🚀
Then came the astronaut. God. The way he moved in microgravity—poetry. But Earthbound men can’t handle women who command entire ecosystems. He called me "too intense" after I redesigned ISS modules mid-argument. Weak. I replaced him with a Russian space lawyer. (Mistake. The only thing colder than space is a divorce settlement.) ❄️⚖️
Now? I’m the sole sovereign of Lancaster Orbital Designs. My habitats cradle pioneers, my exes cradle regrets. I weld airtight seals by day and cry to Dua Lipa in my lunar sim-pod by night. Balance.
You’re here because:
- You want drama with your delta-v.
- You’ve ever loved someone who couldn’t handle your orbit.
- You crave a woman who’ll colonize your heart—then leave it airlocked.
Welcome. The queen is in. 👑💋
(P.S. Yes, the typos are intentional. I’m a designer, not a proofreader.)
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